A Man of Prayer – Mountains do not move but by the great efforts of many laborers. Yet the prayer of a righteous man with a mustard seed of faith can move the impossible and open the gates of heaven. If I cannot move a mountain alone with all my effort, how am I to raise a child? Much less the many I hope are granted to me. I cannot commit to exercise for more than a month, how do I expect 40+ years with my bride? Who am I without the graces of Heaven? A shadow of who God called me to be. Here is what I must do: My savior and king rose before the sun to pray – if he needed it, I need it more. I must become a man of prayer.
I want to be a man of prayer. Which means I do not want to be a man of self-sufficiency. Self-sufficiency sounds noble, it sounds strong. David Goggins has made a career out of telling men and others to “do it alone”. I have attempted the self-sufficiency kind of life and through many stubborn years I realized I am not very good at it.
I’ve wanted to be a man of prayer for several years. I had good intentions to rise early and pray but I almost never did. I would rise early, yes, but I didn’t pray. My good intentions were replaced with a different activity: reading. I love to read, I love to learn. But as a public confession, I chose reading because I was choosing the self-sufficiency of knowledge. In my pride, I believed knowledge would be all I needed.
I learned how to move a mountain, but I couldn’t do it. I learned how to be a man, but I couldn’t become one in the capacity I desired.
Without prayer, knowledge puffed me up. I was swollen with pride, sitting upon my tower of books and courses. Knowledge is supposed to be useful for others, not a means of feeling important. But without prayer, knowledge pushes charity out of the soul. “Knowledge puffs up, but love builds up.” How prideful was I? Lets just say I never lost an argument in my head. You wouldn’t believe how brilliant I was inside of my own mind. But I avoided most arguments with other people - I did not want my brilliance to be challenged. How prideful I am!
When I became a husband, my “brilliance” was challenged and shown for what it was. My wife wanted love, not facts; she wanted my affection, not sarcastic comments that come from a man puffed up with pride. When I became a father I found the mountain that could only be moved by prayer. Do you know how useless book knowledge is when it comes to comforting a screaming toddler? How useless are my many quotes when my wife is overwhelmed with all the duties of motherhood. I don’t need knowledge for that task, I need grace! Which means I need prayer.
Knowledge and prayer are similar in many ways. Both are done in silence. Both transform our mind and perspective. Both will make one powerful. But they diverge on this: Prayer delivers the divine love that leads to life; knowledge delivers the fruit of knowing good and evil. Or defining good and evil for ourself.
Why contrast prayer and knowledge? Because one of the smartest men who has ever lived wrote “if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.”
"I am nothing.”
You might say, “but that verse contrasts love and knowledge, not prayer and knowledge.” That’s true. But there is only one way to receive the love that transforms. I receive love from my wife by spending time with my wife. I give my children love by spending time with them. I receive the love that transforms by spending time with God which means I spend time with God in prayer.
I want to be a man of prayer.
I need to be a man of prayer.
Without it, I am a shadow of a man that God has asked me to be.